We have a web site that has been in business for 12 years. When a regular client found a web site that is using our name with a direct behind it.OURs: opticalcloseouts.com thiers opticalcloseoutdirect.com
Do we have any say in this legal or otherwise?
Are you claiming a trademark on "Optical close outs"? I see no indication of that on your web site. (You would need to place the "TM" symbol after your trademark.)
Do you have a registered trademark for "Optical close outs"? Once again, I see no evidence for this. (You would place the registered symbol after your trademark.)
Without either of these two different trademark protections you have little recourse. Whether you can trademark a descriptive name like "Optical close outs" is another matter.
You should consult an attorney, but be prepared for bad news.